By Michael Vallee
When Tom Brady sauntered into Mile High Stadium Sunday night I was reminded of that line from the movie Rounders, “I feel like Buckner walking back into Shea”. While Brady is no Buckner, he did have to feel a little like Mike McDermott walking back into Teddy KGB’s basement lair. Like McDermott, Brady was returning to the scene of arguably his worst beating. The 20-18 score in the 2015 AFC Championship might have reflected a close game, but those numbers on the scoreboard said nothing of the relentless pounding Brady received from the Broncos. Brady limped out of Denver that day with a 3-7 record and an 80.6 career QB rating in Denver. Mile High had become his proverbial house of horrors.
That was then this is now.
The Broncos may still possess a lot of the same talent on defense but with the departures of quarterback Peyton Manning and most of their Super Bowl coaching staff, Denver is a shell of its former championship self. They entered Sunday’s game an unimpressive 3-5 and on the outside looking in on the AFC playoff picture. Far outside.
Undaunted by previous Bronco beatdowns, unfazed by his surroundings and sensing a vastly inferior opponent, Brady pounced, tossing three touchdowns enroute to an easy 41-16 win. If Brady was spooked by any Von Miller inspired demons he certainly didn’t show it. Brady looked as calm and comfortable as he has all year, racking up a 125.4 QB rating.
Brady’s game experience Sunday night could not have been more different from that brutal Championship game two years ago, as he was hit just two times, a mere fraction of the 20 hits he took in the 2015 bloodbath.
But this game was not all about Brady and the Patriots.
Denver looks lost. A likely reflection of their first year head coach, Vance Joseph, who appears far out of his depth and is clearly not “HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE”. Their offense is a sputtering mess, their once vaunted defense is 29th in the NFL in points allowed and their special teams is ranked dead last according to Football Outsiders. All three deficiencies were on full display against New England.
The Broncos offense, helmed by Brock Osweiler who recently made his not-so-triumphant return to Denver, managed just one touchdown and was held scoreless for the final 22 minutes. Denver’s defense, who apparently didn’t get the memo that New England likes to throw to their backs and work the middle of the field, allowed 16 receptions and three touchdowns to Patriot tight ends and running backs. The short stuff was open all game with little adjustment from Denver’s overwhelmed rookie coach.
But the Broncos saved their worst for special teams where they experienced a complete and total meltdown. After New England’s opening drive stalled, they punted to Denver’s Isaiah McKenzie who proceeded to muff Ryan Allen’s kick. The Patriots recovered on the Broncos’ 24-yard line and scored two plays later. Just over four minutes later, following a Denver field goal, Dion Lewis took the ensuing kickoff and coasted virtually untouched for a 103-yard touchdown. It was a touchdown that could have been denied if Denver’s kicker didn’t allow Lewis to essentially run through him as if he was some kind of apparition.
Early in the second quarter the Broncos gifted the Patriots more points when they allowed Rex Burkhead to burst up the middle and swallow up a Bronco punt, leading to an eventual Gostkowski field goal. For those of you keeping score at home, that’s a muffed punt, a blocked punt and a kick return TD in less than 20 minutes. It might be the worst 20 minutes for a special teams unit in NFL history. On Denver’s next field goal attempt I was all but expecting their kicker to get hit in the face with a pie just before he shanked it.
Imagine what might have happened if New England special teamer savant Matthew Slater wasn’t out with an injury.
With the first part of New England’s high altitude swing under their belt they now head to the even thinner hair of Mexico City to take on the disappointing Oakland Raiders. A win over Oakland puts the Patriots at 8-2 and sets them on a potential home-field collision course with Pittsburgh week 15. For now, however, the Patriots find themselves standing on familiar ground, at the top of the AFC. Not bad for a team that started 2-2 and had Patriots fans from Bangor to Boston pressing the early season panic button.
Notes
Phil Simms 2.0: What the hell has happened to Cris Collinsworth? There was a time, not long ago, when Collinsworth was considered the best in the business. Edgy, smart and interesting he possessed all the requisite qualities to be an elite game analyst. Couple that with a relentless work ethic and Collinsworth was as good as it gets. Now? Not so much. I’m not sure if he became so rich and famous he decided he didn’t want to offend anyone, or if he lost that early motivation that spurs most people starting a new job, or if he simply lost his fastball, but somewhere along the way Collinsworth has morphed into a spineless, annoying dolt that blathers on about nothing and tries to carve out time in every broadcast to kiss somebody’s ass at NFL headquarters. The latest target of his unwavering ass kissery: NFL officials.
It wasn’t so much his desire to praise the officials that was the problem, but the bizarre Phil Simms-esque way that he did it. During the broadcast while attempting to speak effusively about NFL officials and the many challenges they face he said this, “Sometime if you want to get a feel for how hard that job is, go into the NFL offices and check it out.” What does that mean? No, seriously, what does that mean? I literally have no idea. Is he implying any schmo can just show up at the headquarters of the most powerful and paranoid sports league on the planet and say, “Hey, I want to know about how hard it is to be an official”. And then what happens? How exactly do they illustrate how hard an official’s job is? Do they usher you off to a room and play you a video? Do they let you sit down with an NFL official so he can discuss the challenges he faces in the workplace? Do they hire a dramatic actor to read the NFL rule book out loud? Collinsworth is having more and more of these empty moments and it’s starting to drag down what was once the best broadcast team in the game.
The Butler Still Isn’t Doing It: Rough day for Malcolm Butler who spent most of the day chasing Broncos wideout Emmanuel Sanders. Sanders finished the game with 6 catches for 137 yards. Impressive, considering his quarterback is some guy that has been released more times than O.J. Simpson. More troubling is this marks the end of a good stretch of games by Butler and the only variable that was different Sunday night was the return of Stephon Gilmore. It’s hard to fathom that Gilmore’s presence is actually affecting Butler’s ability to cover opposing wide receivers, but it’s not a theory that should be immediately dismissed. The Gilmore signing has been in Butler’s head all year, something he, himself, has admitted, and it’s not unreasonable to wonder if Butler, when playing with Gilmore, feels a certain competitive fire that triggers him to freelance and take foolish chances. Just a theory, but something worth monitoring.
Bum’s Kid Can Coach: Wade Phillips was a lousy head coach but as defensive coordinator he is a certified wizard. In 2015 and 2016, under Phillips, the Broncos defense finished 4th in scoring back-to-back years. This year, with almost the exact same personnel, but a new coach, they are 29th. Phillips is now the new D coordinator for the Rams. Last year they had the 23rd ranked scoring defense. In 2017 they are ranked 3rd. The dude can coach.
The Curious Case Of Martellus Bennett: Martellus Bennett had an innocuous night on the stat sheet, hauling in 3 catches for 38 yards. But those three catches triggered quite the shit storm in the context of how Bennett became a Patriot again. A quick summary: Bennett was released by the Green Bay Packers with a “failure to disclose an injury” designation because they felt Bennett withheld that his shoulder was hurt when he signed a 3-year/21 million contract last March, causing him to explode on Instagram that not only were the Packers lying, their team doctor had pressured him to play with the injury, which then spurred a bunch of current and former Packers to vehemently defend the doctor and question the integrity of Bennett, who then was claimed off waivers by the Patriots and, despite telling Green Bay he was having season-ending surgery because he was in so much pain, played Sunday night for New England. Got it.
Let’s try and answer a few of the questions at the heart of this mess:
Q: Was Bennett injured when he signed with Green Bay?
A: Players get physicals before they sign big contracts so it seems unlikely that Bennett had a significant injury last March that Green Bay was unaware of. We won’t know for sure unless the situation is adjudicated and evidence is presented, which seems likely if the Packers intend on going after Bennett’s signing bonus.
Q: Did Green Bay’s team doctor, Patrick McKenzie, pressure Bennett to play thru an injury?
A: I don’t know Dr. McKenzie from Dr. Doolittle but when everybody that has worked with him rushes to immediately defend him and not a single story surfaces supporting Bennett’s claim, it makes Bennett look like he is full of it. Most likely Bennett was simply pissed and decided to just start slinging arrows at anybody wearing green and gold. Also the Bennett family has a history of having a tenuous relationship with the truth.
Q: Did Bennett fake his injury?
A: Highly doubtful. Bennett claims he notified the Packers of his injury weekly on his body evaluation form and he says he met with several outside doctors about his shoulder. Unless he is a compulsive liar that doesn’t mind being publicly humiliated when the truth comes out, it is unlikely that the injury is a complete fabrication.
Q: Did he quit on the Packers?
A: Hell yeah. Hard to argue that he didn’t when he told Green Bay he was shutting it down for the season then was seen galloping across the field in a Patriots uniform a few days later. There’s an old adage in football, you’re either hurt or injured, and if you’re hurt, you play. Bennett was clearly more hurt than injured but decided that catching passes from some scrub named Hundley just wasn’t worth the pain or risk. Catching passes from the greatest quarterback that ever lived on the other hand, that’s a different story. It also helps when the G.O.A.T. himself personally texts you and asks you to come back.
Q: Did the dark lord, Bill Belichick, orchestrate this entire thing?
A: No, but the world would be a lot more interesting a place if he did. It should surprise nobody that this is immediately what some assumed when New England claimed Bennett off waivers. The Patriots have, um, had some trouble in the past with pushing the envelope to gain a competitive edge and this reputation mixed with good old fashioned jealousy has left them so far imbedded in their opponent’s heads that they even see Patriot conspiracies in the fog. The reality is simple, New England saw a guy that both knew their system and played a position where they were thin and they grabbed him. Initially, Bennett claims he was going to reject the Patriots and get surgery but had a revenge fueled change of heart, “After trying to get (shoulder) fixed and getting waived, you get that vengeance in your heart and you say ‘fuck it, let’s go ball.'”
Onto Mexico (try not to get kidnapped and don’t drink the water)